This picture is a direct reflection of how I feel this year went. I’ve got a killer pair of shoes on paired with my fabulous $3 flee market purse and then I fell flat on my face. WTF?! So I wanted to play a little catch up because I haven’t written in quite some time. I just wanted to share some struggles I experienced this year with my blog and also my personal life. I’ve always been an open book and I will never try and pretend to be something I’m not.
As my blog began to grow this year I applied for several programs. I’ll be honest with you I was pretty confident that I would get accepted. My writing has good content and is relatable, does it cuss too much? Maybe…but YOLO. I want to be the Chelsea Handler of fashion so that’s gonna involve some colorful language, RIGHT?! Mainly, I was hoping to get accepted to the LikeToKnowIt program. I felt confident that could lead to some great exposure. Ultimately my TRUE goal is to become a guest writer for various publications. I have found out I LOVE writing. I’m not sure if I’m good at it, grammatically speaking.
Long story short, I didn’t get accepted. I was seriously hurt. Damn Gina, really?! It was like I was the tall girl at the middle school dance all over again with no one to dance with. I just didn’t have the following and presence they were looking for, which I do understand. I’m telling ya’ll to look for great purses at a flee market, that ain’t really making nobody profit. HAHA! But my goal isn’t to make Nordstrom money, it’s to help you demand the attention of a room without saying a word. So kindly heck of LikeToKnowIt, you’ll eat that rejection email one day I’ll promise you that. And I don’t mean that in a “revenge” aspect, I just mean, I’ll reach my goal without selling myself to be something I’m not. These bloggers post beautiful professional pictures everyday, and I just am not that. Maintaining that "perfect" beautiful presence on social media is A LOT of work. Running to brick walls and putting my hand in my hair just the right way the minute I got dressed became stupid. Again, I’m not calling ANYONE stupid, I just felt stupid. My life became a slave to social media and that WAS NEVER MY GOAL. So I began to resent the entire process.
My phone became my LIFE, so the past few months I put that thing down and started just soaking in the goodness all around me. Because after all, we only have one life to LYV.
Also, during that process of finding myself professionally and where I fit in, in the dynamic of the fashion blogger world my personal life became tough. I just want you to know that no matter how much pretty clothes, fake hair, fake eye-lashes, or fun places we visit, life still throws crap at you, at all of us. And it hits you, smack in the damn face. And it smells like shit. Like, horse shit. No filter can change that. So for me it was very important to never pretend to be something I was not or am not. Grief and sadness touch us all. I just wanted to speak to that and say you’re never alone. This hustle of life is a damn hustle, I mean in the words of great Rick Ross, “ERRRRDAY I’M HUSSSTLINNN”. HAAAA!!!
While in Key West visiting our dear friend for Fantasy Fest my friend Angie and I decided to get henna tattoos, after we had over indulged in pineapple drinks. And then when we woke up the next morning and our bodies had BLACK stains everywhere we tried to remove them with a magic eraser. BOTH EXTREMELY BAD BAD DECISIONS!!!!!
So if you’re feeling like me and ready to put this year behind you, let’s do it. I’ve got new goals I’m looking to conquer and I’m running after them. Even if I fall flat on my face again, it won’t be the first time I’ve gotten up and brushed the dirt off. It sticks a little less each time.
Happy Holidays and ALWAYS remember, being YOU ROCKS. Until next time.
This is a trophy my Dad got me as a little girl. I begged my parents to be in a local beauty pageant as a child, like age 5. I mean I still want to be a Toddler & Tiara when I grow up, that or Erika Jayne, anywhoo. So when I got to the pageant in my JB White’s Easter dress and other little girls were John Bennett Ramsey status I remember feeling like I was out of my league. Of course, I didn’t win, I got a participate trophy and I went to my parents who were cheering, “YAY, YOU WON.” Ummm, hell no, I might be 5 but I see that giant ass trophy over there that I DID NOT WIN GUYS. And I looked at them and said, “I wasn’t pretty enough.” I went to school the next day and when I got home my Dad had gotten me the biggest trophy made that said, “To my GFG (girl friend girls, was my nickname) the MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRL IN THE WORLD.”
Throw that score sheet away, because our paths are unique and ours to conquer. Push your shoulders back and lets show this betch who’s the boss.